Sunrise and New Beginning's

The desert looks beautiful this morning at 8 am. I've been watching the sunrise sparkle on the cresote, Palo Verde trees and saguaro's for the last hour. It's been colder here than normal which is nice for us, but I feel for all those being hit with the big winter storms. I was raised in Wisconsin so I do remember those.

I must say I'm glad Christmas is over and am taking down the tree early. It seems many I know were hit with extra burdens, besides the economy, between Thanksgiving and xmas. I just want a fresh start full of hope. I have plans to put a labyrinth on the property on a natural flat spot by Spring Equinox. I can't tell you what a thrill it was to buy a silly little compass for 7.95! I'll be getting my seed catalogs soon and can't wait to till the dirt; (we get a long growing season in Arizona, and I'm freaking because I can't find my desert gardening book that is my bible when it comes to gardening out here!); off to the horse corals with a wheelbarrow and a kerchief around my face like an cowboy bank robber so I don't sneeze my brains out to gather manure after the first. This is the year I swear to start another compost and keep up with it. We need new chickens, we are down to two (this summer was harsh on the older ones.) I'm planning on going to the SoulCollage facilitator training in March. And after a month of poor eating habits, sitting in the car a lot and not drinking enough water, I want to clean out the cupboards and hit the health food market. My body is craving those fruits and vegies.

Also, since the boys are mostly gone - mostly, this makes me laugh because I was so heartbroken when they started college and went to UofA in Tucson (waa, a whole hour and a half away) and other mothers who had been through this said they come back and they were right. God, they're back a lot! Which I love, and have forged new adult relationships with them, however, I'm expanding my limits and can't interrupt my life every time they come home, a new concept for me, not cooking for them every time they show up for the weekend, well sort of, and this mother is taking over Sam's (the oldest) bedroom, (it is my house after all, right?) which faces the courtyard and has the most light and turning it into a Art Studio! yes! I'm so excited! Right now I have a corner of art epherma and tools carved out in the Study that is rapidly reproducing, like bunnies; seriously, every time I come back into the room it has spread further, across the floor, the chairs, covering things that are not meant to be covered and now after xmas (decorated presents in there, making things xtra special) it is even more difficult to forge a path to my desk to pay bills.

But, before that happens, younger son's -Jason- room needs to be turned into a guest bedroom and because I let them choose the paint for their rooms, two of his walls are, no not black, but red.
So I'm looking for those pre-paste Murals for one wall because the ceiling is 10 feet and the room just looks like a square box -- no feng shui going on in there. I'm thinking of going Victorian in there, using lavender, sage green and yellow for my color palette. AND before I do that both of their closets are filled with -- God I don't know! storage stuff. So the biggest hurdle will be those closets--before the new semester starts!

Well, the light is hitting the Jacaranda tree, which blooms all purple in the spring; the closest thing I could get to my favorite lilacs that don't grow in the desert, brightening all the leaves with sunlight which makes me want to go take a walk.

Have a great day!
xoxo

Beginning without ego; Root Chakra

First Chakra
Companions

Love -- Actually

Hello dear friends,

I hope everyone's holidays went well. I must take time to catch up this weekend and feel the connections. Things have been unusually chaotic and sad. I'm sorry to say hubby and I never did get that weekend, but the world kept turning and things pass and we found closeness in other small acts of kindness in the coming weeks.

I'm my grandmothers caretaker and POA and her care changed, unfortunately for the worse and I worried & stressed for her safety. I think most of us in this age group know the challenge of taking care of our parents or elders in this day and age with everyone living longer due to modern medicine. I wonder with Alzheimer's though...she is 96 -- a tuff ol' bird.

Unfortunately my husbands sister decided it was time to check out of this life, but fortunately she was given another chance after a brief coma. All families handle stress differently. I too suffer from dual-diagnosis, addiction/bi-polar. It's a way of life that takes constant vigilance and some days can get the best of you. I've a necklace with the Serenity Prayer on it that I wore frequently these last few weeks. (The words to the prayer are also on the bracelet cuff around the tree) We spent Christmas eve with my Gram and Christmas afternoon in the pysche ward with my SIL. Somehow it was all okay and I was grateful. Things turned out regardless of my worry or stress. I look forward to getting back to my art.

My eldest son gave me a gift for xmas, one intended to help me keep the faith as I progress in my artistic journey. He took one of my SoulCollage pieces, in fact the one I used for my first 'Welcome' on this blog and had it printed, enlarged on velvet matte canvas paper (really pretty paper, wonderful texture.) He wanted me to see how my art would look, bigger, on artistic paper he said. I tried to say it was SoulCollage, not really my art... but there it was...I was surprised and embarrassed, but he looked so darn proud of me what could I say? I smiled with his enthusiasm and had to believe too. One always has to start somewhere. The metaphoric symbolism that it is one that I call "Tea with Friends in the Secret Garden" was not lost on me. It's a very comforting card.

Showing two SoulCollage cards. One is my sobriety/recovery card and one is my bi-polar card. I think you can guess which is which.

Have the Happiest of New Years, looking forward to reading your blogs this weekend.

love-n-light :)

Sea's Love

Soul with a hundred thousand bodies
Everything's myself; I talk only of me.
Like a wave I rise in my own body--
Sea and wave the same wild water.
~~Rumi

Recently I took a sailing lesson for the first time! This experience was fantastic, so I made a record of it. The picture and the poem says it all.

Have an inspired weekend!
Hubby and I have the house to ourselves for three days! I'm inspired!

May the wind be at your back!

love -n- light
cyn

Learning, learning, learning

If your nerve deny you, go about your nerve. ~~Emily Dickinson

I love art, I'm inexperienced, that's okay -- I can learn; I've got an Art History background, Sculpting and Photography --though these were many moons ago, they're still there, in my heart and mind. After looking at a plethora of other artist site's this morning I became inexplicably terrified! This is absolutely not possible screamed my insignificant but, loud critic. I've already posted on religion and deleted it, something on techniques that I probably screwed up and just showed my ignorance. Hells Bells! I've been stuck, not knowing what to do next to learn what I needed to, my community is small and doesn't offer much. However, --Opportunity! for me down the line...So not to push the panic button, slow down this horse and think: the thing about meeting many of you gals out there is you have links to sites that can teach, that can inspire, that I've already ordered Claudia Hellmuths 'How To' dvd's -- so going about my nerve.

So suck it up girlfriend, you're still dancing in the right direction. Rome wasn't built in a day. This is my SoulCollage card for the day.

love & light
cyn

thinkArete

A favorite SC card

I love the colors in this card and all the symbolism.
My computer busted and I got the flu, but all is well and healed. This card came in a dark time, but now, when I'm flourishing, I'm reminded of the resiliency of spirit. That nothing, especially emotions, are permanent.

SoulCollage Reading

This morning I awoke moody and turned on the news with decaf coffee instead of being bothered with the healthier option of a routine; I forewent morning pages, Course in Miracles morning reflection and meditation and a walk out back in the fresh, albeit cold, air.

This is like throwing a stick of dynamite in a gas tank! So, before I would lose the total day to the spooling of negative thinking I grabbed my SoulCollage cards and pulled two, a third stuck to the bottom of one unnoticed and dropped down in the middle of the reading, hence it's place below.

This is what I heard from my cards (I'm still not good at "I am the one who.." yet) so I'll freelance it. The first one is my "Child of the Universe" card, haven't decided if it is Council or Committee. This was immediate. Reality is much bigger than the illusions of pain or misfortune I create. It is also my choice whether I go it alone on this journey or not.

The Second was my Sexuality Committee card. "Voluptous." What the heck?! I thought, what in the world does that have to do with anything, but I took a couple of deep breathes and let the spirit speak to me and I looked again with different eyes. Well, it's kind of hard to feel like crap when you look at this card! It's bursting with energy, confidence, there is also some wide open 'se le vie.' "Don't take life so seriously, silly." - Okay, I thought, I can do that just for today.

The Third, the one in the middle below, first let me say I had no idea that red ribbon had anything to do with a popular vampire novel. I saw the image in photobucket and used it, I've since learned it's importance from many fans, namely my son's girl buddies. oops -- it fits from what I understand -- Anyhow, "The Timeless Youth of Love" was originally made to help me remember that first passion, especially when my sons started getting serious about their respective girlfriends. It's easy to forget all that passion when one is in a loving, but comfortable (still fun)relationship, but not that intense, crackling with new discoveries all the time. So when this came up, coupled with the other cards and my mood, and my not talking a lot before hubby left this morning, I felt a pang. I looked at the girl and boy holding hands in the Universe on the other card and back to this one and my heart just melted with love. My dear honey, he is in the same place I am; be kind. We are in this together, and I love him very, very much. He, we deserve to be kinder to ourselves.

So first thing is a telephone call to tell him so, next is off to the gym for some swimming laps and tending to mundane things like groceries -- the leftovers are gone; time to get creative in the kitchen again, and I'll probably stop at the nursing home just to kiss my gram on the cheek and sneak her in some Madelinne's and coffee from Starbucks. And news is off! listening to the Symphony channel.

love & light
cyn

Transfers; Gel Mediums and Beeswax

This is in answer to an email that I thought might benefit other artist and hopefully myself, because I'm not sure I'm doing this right and would like to know if others have other useful techniques.

Anyhow, Beeswax and gel mediums... first they can't be used on card stock or mat board. The gel medium I do use as an adhesive, less bubbling, easier to burnish without stretching out the image, thinner coat, dries without seeing brush strokes, especially if I dab with paper towel or rag.

I am just learning to use both on wood and canvas. Experimenting; many failures so far. I've read about different techniques in two or three collage books (mentioned later under Beeswax info), some of the directions aren't that clear -- or I'm just screwing up -- learn more from mistakes than success, hey? ;0 However here is, sort of a good 1rst description for the gel medium and the site shows workshops http://www.goldenpaints.com/products/medsadds/gels/gels.php

There is a couple of different things you can do with the gel, one is make 'skins.' This works well with ink jet, but I'm using it fine with a laser printer. You print out your image and start layering it with gel med. (I use matte) there is a plethora of different ones, even grainy ones with pumice in them -- try them for different techniques.) Layer, dry; layer, dry; layer, dry -- sometimes one layer is good --then under running water or in a tupperware tub of water (I use -- deep enough to cover the image) you rub off the back -gently. You are left with a 'skin' of the image that can be applied any which way, giving dimension and texture.

Now this method is the one I'm still practicing with. Applying gel medium to a surface, like a canvas board, put the image onto the gel area, burnish with a bone folder, slowly lifting up corners to see that the image is adhering. It's supposed to be simple. So far I've had mixed results depending on what I'm adhering to, as well issues transferring on top of already existing image.

There are all sorts of things to look out for. Printing onto different kinds of paper, and many images, depending on color, won't transfer onto another image already placed (whether to transfer on to sealed piece vs. unsealed) -- at least it won't be visible, too dark -- too light, You have to think in layering lighter to darker. But lets say I transfer a pattern as my background, seal, then adhere other images, or transfer a darker one. There are tricks of the trade I'm not sure of yet. Resource: http://www.talbot1.com/collage_supplies/

Beeswax is simple in some ways, hot and weird in another. Like I said, I'm going by trial and error with no instruction so this could be all poor advice. They sell beeswax in the craft store in chunks, sometimes in pellets. Pellets are better because then you don't have to worry about breaking off the chunks of hard wax. There is natural and white. The natural will leave kind of an antique look, the white is clear..but you will always get an opaque feel. I melt the wax in a chocolate melter or small crock pot. Brush a layer to the wood block or canvas and turn image upside down on it, again using a solvent (acetone, xylene, Citrasolve, oil of wintergreen or paint thinner -- make sure your room is well ventillated -- your supposed to wear rubber gloves, I forget 1/2 the time) to remove backing. Remember your image will be reversed. I can't figure out how to get my copier to reverse an image yet. I'm horribly unskilled as of yet when dealing with iphoto or the printer, supposedly Adobe Photo Shop can scan the image and flip it. The good thing about wax is if you don't like the look of it, you can melt off the image using a quilting iron and start again. Resource: http://www.hgtv.com/hgtv/cr_scrapbooking_memory/article/0,,hgtv_3318_3748819,00.html

You can also water transfer. For water transfer, print an image onto glossy ink-jet photo paper, spray the transfer surface with water, apply the photo paper image side down, and burnish. The amount of water depends on the texture and rag content of the transfer surface: Slick paper requires less water whereas textured requires more.

Okay, that is the sum of my knowledge so far. Reading back I can see why I get confused when reading others descriptions on transferring techniques. Good Luck.

Sat-Chakra-Nirupana

Her lustre is that of a strong flash of young lightning.
Her sweet murmur is like the indistinct hum of swarms of love-mad bees.
She produces melodious poetry...
It is She who maintains all the beings of the world by means of
inspiration and expiration,
and shines in the cavity of the root lotus
like a chain of brilliant lights.

~~Sat-Chakra-Nirupana
in Anodea Judiths' "Wheels of Life"
versus 10 & 11 of the Sat-Chakra-Nirupana, as translated by Arthur Avalon in "Serpent Power."

The Hours

Hello, I spent time reading some wonderful SoulCollage sisters blogs this morning, figuring out managing the tools for blogging. I think I've changed my profile at least 6 times. The best thing about this process is I'm condensing the who of me, it seems with a palette knife, but the thickness feels good; there's meaning and depth. Then I scattered over to writing on the Root Chakra, which went deeper than I first thought it would so that won't be posted today. Finally a long, deep, well-needed nap overtook me and when I woke I spent time reading through a delightful collage book who's artist, Barbara De Pirro techniques' sparked new ideas.

I love these Guardians; they bring me sturdiness of vision when I step through the gate to the other side, I remember safety, and that the minutia of problems I may be experiencing are but illusions in the distance.
Love & Light

Source Card

This card is about that mystical experience of Absolute and unconditional love. I fell down a mountain hiking and was unconscious for several minutes, beings of light surrounded me, there are no words for the place of forgiveness, no ego, just love. I questioned after, whether it was just my brain firing off sparks and my brain in self preservation mode. It has to be that simple of a statement. One of the last scenes of the movie "Contact" speaks what I wish to express beautifully:

Kitz: "Then why don't you simply withdraw your testimony and concede that this journey to the center of the galaxy, in fact, never took place?!"
Ellie Arroway: "Because I can't. I had an experience. I can't prove it. I can't even explain it. But everything that I know as a human being, everything that I am, tells me that it was real. I was given something wonderful, something that changed me forever. A vision of the universe that tells us, undeniably, how tiny, and insignificant and how rare and precious we all are. A vision that tells us that we belong to something that is greater than ourselves, that we are not, that none of us, are alone. I wish I could share that. I wish that everyone, if even for one moment, could feel that awe, and humility, and the hope, but .. that continues to be my wish."

I am the one who carries you
when you believe all is lost.
I am the one who's
love is unconditional
and never ending.

in love & light
cyn